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G-Man

T'WAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS

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> T'was the night before Christmas -

> Old Santa was pissed

> He cussed out the elves

> and threw down his list

> Miserable little brats,

> ungrateful little jerks

> I have good mind

> to scrap the whole works

> I've busted my ass

> for damn near a year

> Instead of "Thanks Santa"

> what do I hear

> The old lady bitches

> cause I work late at night

> The elves want more money -

> The reindeer all fight

> Rudolph got drunk

> and goosed all the maids

> Donner is pregnant

> and Vixen has AIDS

> And just when I thought

> that things would get better

> Those &%$#@! from IRS sent me a letter

> They say I owe taxes -

> if that ain't damn funny

> Who the hell ever

> sent Santa Clause any money

> And the kids these days -

> they all are the pits

> They want the impossible ...

> Those mean little shits

> a whole year making

> wagons and sleds

> Assembling dolls...

> Their arms, legs and heads

> I made a ton of yo yo's -

> No request for them

> They want computers and robots..

> they think Im IBM!

> Flying through the air...

> dodging the trees

> Falling down

> chimneys and skinning my knees

> I'm quitting this job...

> there's just no enjoyment

> I'll sit on my fat ass

> and draw unemployment

> There's no Christmas this year..

> now you know the reason

> I found me a blonde..I 'm

> going SOUTH for the season

> to be with the G-Man

> and for good reason!!

Happy Holidays,

Gary :)

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