What is the nastiest thing ????

26 replies to this topic
  • sathumper

Posted November 11, 2003 - 09:54 PM


Hey guys just a fun posting....whats the nastiest thing that has happened to you while out riding?????

Well over the years I have crashed my brains out, ridden into fences, cows, other bikes, holes, fallen off mine dumps but without a doubt the nastiest thing happened last week-end....i went out riding with a bit of a head/nasal cold and about an hour into the ride, after tons of dust etc. ...I sneezed and yes.... :D :D :D..you can imagine the mess...inside of helmet etc. Really gross but funny after the fact :D
Will wait next time till cold has gone :D

:) Mark

  • endurodog

Posted November 11, 2003 - 11:06 PM


While riding in Louisana I hit a tree on day 1 of a 2 day race. I hit it really hard impacting my "stuff" on the gas tank. I was there with a few guys racing also. I couldn't go out on day 2 cause the stuff hurt so bad so I just hung around the motorhome. We headed for home on Sunday night and when I got up on Monday I was black and blue all the way from my belly button to my knees, everything. Stayed that way for weeks too. It was pretty gross.

  • jwriott

Posted November 12, 2003 - 12:35 PM


Rode up on a dead guy that jumped off the I-70 bridge about 300 feet above the trail in the San Rafael Swell. Head squished sideways and his eyes were still open. That was gross.

  • oldbones

Posted November 12, 2003 - 12:50 PM


When I was about 12, I took out my Mom's Yamaha Enduro175, cause it was actually faster (top speed) than my yz80. While testing the top speed capabilities, I happened upon Mamma Cow, impacting her in the rear quadrant. I am not 100% sure what happened next, but as best as I could peice together, the right handlebar (and my right arm up to the elbow) seemed to dissapear for a while into the nether regions of said cow :). One thing I know for sure, somehow, the "seal" was broken, and the floodgates let free. I limped the bike on home, and my Mom tried real hard not to fall over laughing while she took the garden hose to me and the bike in the driveway.

  • Math

Posted November 12, 2003 - 01:46 PM


Rode up on a dead guy that jumped off the I-70 bridge about 300 feet above the trail in the San Rafael Swell. Head squished sideways and his eyes were still open. That was gross.

This is the nastiest riding story I've ever heard. :D :) :D :D :D

  • jwriott

Posted November 12, 2003 - 03:13 PM


You asked for the nastiest.

The thing that really sucked is that an hour before, we stopped on the side of I-70 and helped with a rollover accident where the driver died at the scene while we helped his daughter and her kids.

Then we leave pretty shaken only to come upon this guy in the middle of the trail. It was not a good day for sure.

  • rohar

Posted November 12, 2003 - 04:22 PM


Daaaaamn! That's waaaaay beyond nasty! :)

  • endurodog

Posted November 12, 2003 - 06:33 PM


Damn Vmax you got mine beat hands down. That will ruin a days ride for sure.

Oldbones beats mine to, and it's funny one to boot.

  • banffboy

Posted November 12, 2003 - 07:06 PM


Niiiiiiiiiiice Oldbones!! and I was just about to go and have a steak. Looks like chicken tonight :) :D :D

  • ETP

Posted November 12, 2003 - 08:01 PM


In my teens, I was riding flat out on a dirt road and my buddy passed me going about 70mph. He turned to smile at me as he went by and hit a big rock. Now he was sailing at 70mph like Superman next to me. He hit the road arms first and I stopped to go back. He was in shock and his left hand was dangling by a few tendons only, bone sticking out, bleeding. He looked down at it, and passed out. I blew beets, and then rode to get help. He still has a big metal plate holding his forearm together. That was my grossest.

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  • CronicArt

Posted November 12, 2003 - 08:19 PM


Well I'd have to say on Oct.14 only 4 miles into my ride I crashed hard. I have ridin this trail about 100 times and I always come up on this one section too fast, forgetting about a big puddle. I've hydroplaned this puddle many times and since I didn't want to lose momentum I decided what the heck. Usually I hit it on the right side but this time I decided to go for the left.(looked like less water) Any way I wheelie through at about 40mph. Just before I'm about to hit dry land again my front end dips into a rut and stopped me dead. I went over the bars striaght into the ground wyle e cyote style. No slide, just sudden 40mph impact. I took the shot with the left side of my head and shoulder. I didn't get knocked out but all my colors were messed up. I looked at my YZF and it looked green. To make a long story short I wound up with.... Broken clavical, broken thumb, sprained back, seperated AC in my shoulder, bruised ribs, and a good cuncusion. Nothing happened to my bike. I go back to work this sunday.LOL I still like the cow story better!

  • DesertChris

Posted November 13, 2003 - 08:41 AM


Back in April I had a race that went behind a farm's grazing pasture. I am crusing along the fence next to the pasture and the course takes a right up a giant wash heading back into the desert away from the pasture. This is where the farmer put the dead cows, there was 8 to 10 of them rotten in the desert sun. The smell of death didn't disapate for a few miles and being a hare scramble we had to pass through this area twice. The little evil voice in my head was telling me to try and jump one but the rational voice explained how gross it would be if the cow exploded all over me and the bike leaving chunks of rotting flesh, maggots and a smell that wouldn't go away for a long time.

  • Merfman

Posted November 13, 2003 - 10:04 AM


Two "nastiest" stories, both at the same race site:

1) Two days before enduro. Fire chat sessions evolve into night ride. Enduro is on cattle ranch. (Big ditch filled with winter kill amongst the grossness) Local fast guy decides that he could cut the trail in one particular section. What he'd forgotten from daylight hours was the particularly dead bovine blocking the shortcut. Resulting crash left said rider with his helmet stuck in rotting bovine carcass. LMAO.

2) Same race, race day. There's a concrete culvert that goes under the freeway. Local bovine population hung out under the road, in the culvert, for a year before the race. You can imagine the amount of urine and feces that was collected under bridge. Add about 2" of rain the night before. And, yes, a very fun loving promoter that decided that the only way to get across the road was to go under the road, through the culvert and stagnant, ummm mixture. 3 loops were run in this race. By the time the 3rd loop started, the mixture was well and truly mixed and churned into a drippy yogurt-like texture. The top of the culvert was about 9 or so feet all. There were 500 or so riders in the race.. so, by the start of the 3rd loop, there was yogurt litterally dripping from the ceiling of the culvert. Big, slimy stalactites of cow goo were hanging from the ceiling awaiting the riders. The walls and roof were covered and the waterhole was about two feet deep. THAT was the nastiest thing I'd ever seen, dead bodies aside.

On a side note, some poor schmuck actually fell in the goo. He was totally covered with a consistent shade of cowpie. I literally fell off my bike laughing when the poor guy pulled up to the special test.


PS, Endurodog, you *were* OK weren't you?

  • Garry_on_a_426

Posted November 13, 2003 - 11:29 AM


It was not riding,

When I was about 17 years old I was out at the river just south of lake havasu on the Parker strip.

There were these 2 guys in a flat bottom, blown, stupid fast boat ripping up and down the river. They came too close to the south damn, and there was a string of buoys held together by a 1/2 cable. These guys went straight towards it (they were obviously very drunk) and the boat went under it, one ducked, the other didn't and was decapitated about 50 foot from where I was sitting.

don't drink and drive ANY thing.

  • kywr450r

Posted November 13, 2003 - 11:44 AM


When I about 10 years old riding a Honda XL 70... I took a shortcut through a ditch at about 10mph. While going down the ditch (single trail, about 8 ft elevation change)... a mother skunk and about six young skunks were on the trail. I believe I drove over a couple of little ones before letting go of the handle bars in shear fright. Needless to say, Mother skunk and all of the little ones let me have it. This happened in about 1976 before full face helmets were popular... my entire face and neck area were soaked with skunk scent and I couldn't restart my bike...it was a long (over five mile walk home) on the North Dakota prairie.

Also had a similar situation while herding cattle on a Suzuki DS185 (mechanical horse) while in high school. While trying to prod a cow with the front tire of my bike at about 3MPH, she lifted her tail and shot crap all over my face and shoulder area... I dropped the bike in disgust and broke a finger and couple of hand bones in the fall. :)

  • BrandonW

Posted November 13, 2003 - 12:48 PM


First race of the year was held in Bellingham, WA. I was posted up at the first corner, wathing the earlier racers start.

DOn't know what wave it was, but there was a big pile up, and bikes and riders were falling all over each other.

The nasty part came in when a dude fell up against the rear wheel of a 2-smoke Gas Gas, and the Gas Gas throttle was stuck wide-open. The dudes hand got sucked in between the rear whell and the swing-arm. The Gas Gas guy kinda tried to pick up his bike, and the dude with the stuck arm way yelling for all he was worth.

FINALLY, the Gas Gas guy shut it down, the other guy pulled out his hand, and if it was not broke, he would have been swinging.

He took off his glove, and it was instantly black and blue, and really puffed up.

Gave me the Willies for the rest of the day.

  • yamahasocal450

Posted November 13, 2003 - 07:06 PM


not the nasties but surely the funniest, alright we took my friend and his dad riding and his dad had a 1980 some dual sport 600 that he just bought and the friend had an xr100. First the dad tries loading the bikes in the truck with a door... yes a door gets half way up the door and it snaps in 2 and he flips off with the bike on top of him...classic i was laughing too hard to even help him... so we get riding actually and within 2 hours all the dual sport stuff on his dad's 600 is torn off.. completely.. so we're going up this somewhat steep rocky trail and he manages to launch the bike 4 feet ahead of him and he falls with the bike still running kicking up rocks and hitting him in the head, wow i really had a laugh there :D :) and then after that ride he yelled at the person who sold him the bike and made him take it back because all the lights came off :D

  • John_H

Posted November 13, 2003 - 09:21 PM


not as bad as her broken toe or broken, lacerated finger :), but my girlfriend landed on a prickly pear cactus last summer. Spent 45 min. pulling needles outta her. OUCHHHH

  • FTD

Posted November 17, 2003 - 11:28 AM


There were these 2 guys in a flat bottom, blown, stupid fast boat ripping up and down the river. They came too close to the south damn, and there was a string of buoys held together by a 1/2 cable. These guys went straight towards it (they were obviously very drunk) and the boat went under it, one ducked, the other didn't and was decapitated about 50 foot from where I was sitting.

I was riding a four wheeler in the fall around the property of a ski mountain. I was riding up on one knee. I was flying across a field and stopped to put some kleenex back into my pocket that was about to fall out. Still up on one knee I wiped my eyes, went to take off and about 3 feet in front of me was a cable for the ski lift right at neck level.
Thanks Jesus!!

I've got lots of gross stories from the ER in San Antonio but I'll spare the non-riding yuck.

  • RCannon

Posted November 17, 2003 - 04:11 PM


I was 6 years old. My buddy and I were riding out west of Salt Lake City (Delle) near the train tracks.

We happen upon a GIANT bloody area. Tire tracks all over, but massive amounts of blood. Two thin strips led over behind a giant sagebrush.

Our parents later told us there had been a murder at that spot. Some lady was hitch-hiking and some sick sob cut her throat there the night before.


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